Alone

I know im not alone, i have many friends, i have boyfriend, i have family, i have Allah s.w.t.
But idk why, i feel empty inside. Why am i not happy?
I find myself so complicated, so dumb. I realised i been increasing weight way way too much. yet, i don do anything about it. I just don know. Somebody pls slap my face.
I just miss my childhood, when i worry nothing.

I feel so stress in school, i really feel like i cannot cope, but i have to keep moving on. i already failed my journey in JC and disappoint my family. I have to make it this time. To earn Diploma Of Merit at least. I have to. I wish to be  good nurse, and be able to teach future student nurses. At least i have an aim. And to find someone who can tolerate me, and adjust to my job style..
I want izzi to be my last, at least thats wat i hope for. And i really wan to lose weight.
But how?
Well, im gonna run and run.For at least everyday now. Im tired of people calling me names, and making fun of me. i have to be determined this time. Sigh.

I know i have the bestest things in the world, i just couldn find the reason of my unhappiness inside me. I really don know.
Maybe its cause im pms but sometimes i don feel tat way.. i don know..

i wonder who will even read this blog of mine, its like so dead. HAHA