the earth is moving, but i cant feel the ground.

Been waiting for you more than a year, a few weeks should be nothing ba :/

giving up?

this morning, as i woke up to study my chem, i tot to myself, if only ive done my tutorials, n practice regularly, and done well for prelims , all my prelims,maybe i wouldn have freaked out like i am now. if only, i listen to my teachers, if only i don take every exam for granted, if only i don and fool around, if only im more serious wit my schoolwork, if only i know wat i plan ahead for my future early, if only i just focus& do my work, if i only i work hard starting from day one. if only, if only..

but it's too late now.in 2 hours time, im officially having my Alevel Chem paper 3. how time flies. i just finished my entire notes, but i felt is not enough. felt super disappointed man. thinking abt yesterday of how my mum giving me support, altho im late for my paper. im damn touch. im abt to cry. but i know i gotta be strong for my paper. it's my last and only chance. today, 30min to memorise all those formulas & organic chem stuff. i think im half prepared but i gonna give my shot anyway.

ytd geog? was just ok. i don expect much. i jus berserah. tats wat im goin to do. jus berserah. cume Allah swt yg tau how my life works. 18 years ive been living in this world, i felt like centuries & u noe wat? ive been living in a dark world. haha. i have so much love actually. my mum, my late dad, my bros and my sis plus my grandma. now wat am i lacking? nth beats family's love. really. nothing. i have friends tat stick wit me, n im so grateful.

im on the verge of giving up. but im not going to give up. i know im mentally tired. physically tired. am so tired. but the support. its more den i ever wish to have. my brother givin me a sign of not to give up & jus give my best shot. "try ur best mira" ): thinking of it. i feel so sad. i suddenly tot of my responsibility towards this family. my family din give up. so why shd i give up? jus like tat? no way. 444 dollars my mum paid this cert of mine. why shd i give up? unless Allah swt stops me and wish me to repeat so i could do better, tats a different thing. i shdn give up now. mira don give up. don give up. 9 more papers to go. u can do it.

yes i can do it. heh . i can do it. not gonna give up. my family don give up. why shd i waste her time & effort? yeah, 2 years. u go mira.

im worried for my results.

i want to REALLY start now.

im willing do anything. from now onwards, i wont be the same anymore.

I WILL WORK HARD!